Tortoise and the Hare-The Moody Blues

How can it be that the tortoise wins the race, when it always looks like the hare should? In reality the hare is the "histrionic" entity and the tortoise is the "perfectionist" entity. Somewhere in-between the two is another animal, perhaps a dog that is ideal.

Dogs are lovely; they are cute and they can be slow or fast, emotional or rational. I'm not an taxonomist (one who classified species) by any means, however, I sense things and believe we fall somewhere in between the hare and the tortoise when we are most healthy – physically and emotionally (especially emotionally, because we are deeply affected physically when we are not emotionally healthy).

The Hare

Think of the hare, the easiest one in the Aesop’s Fable to identify. Rushing around, looking for all the world like the potential winner. Adorable and soft and fluffy and almost irresistible!

People love standing next to the hare – if they can EVER be found to be standing still -- listening to him/her, following their desirable lead. The politically active, the one in the know, the one TO know. Always with an opinion, always seen more right than not. Active, fit, healthy in mind and body.

In reality the hare is prideful and unaware of the world around them because they SEE themselves so out-in-front they miss the realities of life. They wear blinders to block out the reality they somehow sense is all around them and would defeat them if they would only stop long enough to realise reality. They are stressed beyond measure trying to stay out in front, too.

The Tortoise

The tortoise has always been the winner, but in some ways could the tortoise win only because of the hare’s lack of focus on where the bloody finish line is? The tortoise-perfectionist checks everything? Every footfall? Every word? Every commitment? No wonder they are perceived to be so slow.

Their progress depends more on time than on activity. And their progress depends on making “perfect” decisions (and receiving approval), when reality is full of so many decisions. Progress is more by accident than design, as when they are confused they keep their heads in most of the time trying to reason it all out before they take their next step.

Yet the tortoise wins, not by purposing to win, but by plodding along afraid to turn to the right or left or experience anything other than what seems perfect at the time.

The Canine

So let’s look at the canine, the dog, the puppy. Eager, random and quick sometimes; slow, specific and particular at other times. And always with a smile, enthusiasm and hope in the heart.

They see a goal, a finish line and consider it, not for a treat or praise, but to see if it is worthy of pursuing before one paw goes in motion. Once decided, they look around them and inspect their pathway, smelling out the best way to pursue their goal. Until they are certain, they wait. Then begin after they are happy with their choices.

Speed is not always their strategy, because they seem able to sense danger and are wary of something that seems unfamiliar and that might deter them from their goal. They may wander in big circles, seeming to waste energy, yet they use their nose and nous to scope out danger and fun along their pathway.

Another thing that commends the canine is that they are not always interested in winning, but in having fun and enjoying every minute. Even their sleep can be delightful to watch as they sometimes yip in their sleep, pursuing either hare or tortoise down rabbit holes and into hollow tree trunks to “round them up” for some fun, against both the hare’s and the tortoise’s better judgement.

Virtual or Real

In our virtual life, it seems the differences and realities of real life are also, not surprisingly, dramatised into bigger-than-life challenges sometimes, so it is easier to observe yourself and others and see the behaviours more clearly.

I mean, think about it, sometimes you just sit back and watch things unfold so smoothly and you can SEE dangers and clear pathways in a more reliable and more focused way in the virtual world -- just because it is right there before you!

I think, no, I hope I have been mostly a canine in my life, but fear I’ve tried on both tortoise and hare too often. How about you?

Pain & Misery

I still love the man I married once upon a time, when I was only nineteen and running away from all the bad stuff that my short life had thrown at me. Of course I still love him, although I do not like some of the things that happened, yet love is not something you just turn off and on...well perhaps something is wrong with me ‘cause I’ve just never figured out how to stop those feelings.

Why would I still care about him? Because I always will and now his life, you see, has taken many strange and painful turns. He’s faced more pain than I could ever imagine with serious health challenges and he remains my friend. Recently, he and I were talking about a mutual friend who had lost their brother and he said a most profound thing,

“Pain is inevitable; misery’s a choice.”

So pure. He hung up the phone. I hung up the phone. Yet somehow my hand stayed on the receiver as I was gripped with the pure simplicity of these six words! Of course we ALL know this. We are not foolish, yet how easy it is to forget this simple, simple statement.

I keep a yellowing index card right here, taped to the books that are holding up my laptop. I keep it there so I can see it every moment I am sitting here “living” my other life. It says, “It’s YOUR choice!” And no matter how often I read that card, many times I slip into a helpless misery or surrender to circumstances.

The virtual world I inhabit at first seemed simple and pretty and fun and crowded with music and beauty. Yet, as in all life, there are dark things that look like they are safe and places that are beautiful, like a Pandoraian paradise, filled with the most vicious of creatures.

Then there are the politically astute and those who are pretenders who do so much damage with words, whispers and doctored “quiet messages” no one hears but those favoured ones read. This world of many layers is a world where damage can begin and never be controllable because of the wildfire nature of unchecked suspicion and the candy like addiction to casual rumour.

How tragic a virtual life can be when hearts behind the screen are disregarded in an all out determination to simply win at all costs.

• Friendship
• Sincerity
• Communication
• Integrity
• Humility
• Compassion
• Grace
• and Love.

When these are forgotten, joy turns to chaos; fun to work; love to suspicion and pain to misery.

How to guard against it? Thankfully, in the virtual world, you can truly rise above it and fly away; on the worst of days you can log off and step away from this machine that now links us together with others and take time to stop multi-tasking long enough to think things back into reasonable perspective.

In the real world it takes a different, but similar, strategy. Nevertheless, sometimes in the virtual world the pain is so real it is a struggle to guard against a nagging misery. That’s where friends come in.

Until you meet real friends
True friends,
Friends who appear before you to embrace you
As warmly as in that other world.
Friends who stay with you through
The Dickensonian “best of times and worst of times”.
Friends, just like those gold ones your Mom/Mum told you were out there.
Friends who accept you with sympathy, empathy and grace.
Even special friends who hold you
Through the pain to keep the misery far from you.

No matter what world you inhabit, one thing is certain – you can’t do it alone. Whoever wrote, “No man is an island”, was right!

DEVIOUS TRUTH & WHITE LIES

“What is truth”,
he asked the Man standing in front of him;
a gentle person condemned to death
by the politics of the day.
Nothing he could do would save the Man
and he never got his answer.

So...
What is TRUTH?
How do we know it when we see it?
What does it feel like?
Is it rational or irrational?
Is it situational or sensational?
Can we measure it or weigh it?

Does EVERYBODY but Mork, of Mork and Mindy, lie?

"Do you like my new gown, honey",
She asks, all hopeful and fragile?
It is appalling to me;
To her a work of art and effort.
What do I say?
"It is interesting." Is that a lie?
"It is colourful."
Hopefully it is at least that.
Or that will definitely be a lie.
Is it of good form or workmanship?
"You always take such care about how you are dressed."

Inflection.
Sarcasm.
Cynicism.
Tone.
Colour/Viaz in a voice.

I love your gown.
I LOVE your gown.
I love YOUR gown.
I love your GOWN.

Can I know in truth?
Can I stand in truth?
Or Swear in truth?
Will I live in truth?
Or die in lies?

Do you know?
Can you tell?
Really?
How?

Maybe I want you to know.
Maybe I don’t.

Motive plays in truth.
LOVE my gown (because then you love me)

Can we take the truth?
Or are lies more comforting?
Even when we know they are lies.

Omission?
Commission?

Sometimes telling the whole truth,
Is not all the truth, but enough.
Sometimes telling the whole truth,
Is meant to damage and/or confuse.
Sometimes telling some of the truth,
Confuses or diverts or delays truth.
Sometimes it is just lying.

Recognition?
Heartbreak or hope?

Does the daisy lie or tell truth?
He loves me,
he loves me not,
he loves me…
Please do not tell me.
Soon enough I will know.
Not soon enough I will be ready.
He COULD love me, you know.
Couldn’t he?

Dreams?
Illusions?

And what of my dreams?
Dashed by truth?
You are too short.
Or too ugly.
Or you have a bum leg.
You are not smart enough.
Or then again, you are too smart.
Too qualified.
Too unqualified.

Gossip?
Grapevine?

The method of propagation.
The strength of deceit.
The weakness of truth.
Around corners and under bushes.
The whispers flow like the
Inevitable strength of omnipotent waters.
Non can stay its hands.
As they strangle truth
Almost to death.

Yet…
Like Tinkerbelle
We long to rescue.
To save.
To bring life.
And hope and good.
And we DO believe and trust,
That truth CAN overcome deceit.

But we must always wait for truth,
To overcome deceit, it seems.